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| Last Light |
Some of you already know, yet a better understanding of what I have before me is now mine. No, I do not have all the answers. The true knowing will not be mine till the journey has been completed. And even then, all may not be understood.
On my 58th birthday, I was informed that I have a cancerous tumor in the lower third
of my esophagus. The actual type is called Adenocarcinoma, which is what the cancer that can form in our mucus forming tissues is called. It is the most common form of esophagul cancer. Did not make for a good birthday, but honestly it may become a great gift.
As of today, it has been 22 days and I can finally put out some solid information of what I have as well as what I may have before me. After all the test in the past couple of weeks, there is no current sign of cancer in any other part of my body. It is only located in this tumor, and that is the truly wonderful news. Now that does't mean that there are not any isolated cells of cancer elsewhere in my body. Just no collections or detectable groupings at this time. The journey before me will be that passage through the many treatments to reach a physical state of being cancer free and of good health.
The treatments will begin on Monday the 21st of July, almost a month to the day that I found out. I will have both radiation and chemotherapy for 5 weeks, followed by a period of healing of 4 to 6 weeks, then the actual surgery to remove what is left of the tumor followed by another 4 to 6 weeks of healing from the surgery. It may take months or even longer to fully recover my strength and get back to normal activity.
I have found that the treatments seem to scare me much more than the actual cancer.
It is not that I don't fear dying of the cancer, I do. It is that the treatments have so many unknown side affects, and this unknown is what I actually fear. The not knowing, and in many ways not being able to influence these side affects in any way.
So that is the basics of the journey before me. The only way is to pass through this upcoming darkness, this period of the unknown...
Cancer brings out the Zen in you. There is so little you can actually do, other than ride the treatment wave. It's a life lesson for type A's. Sleep when you're tired. I can't say this enough. Sleep is your friend. Keep your medical team updated on your side effects - there are things that can be done to control them. love & hugs!
ReplyDeleteMike know that there is support for you and that the side effects have treatments too!!! Bob and I are happy to help if you need it. Transport to the treatment or stay with you while Tanya works or any thing that will support you through this dark time. You will be in our prayers and I will put you on the prayer chain at Church as well.. In His Love, Bob and
ReplyDeleteRuth Ann
Thank you for your bravery in sharing this journey with us! You have many friends and family who love you both immediately present and always spiritually present to see you through this - we are by your side always!!!
ReplyDeleteMichael, you have too much left to do in the darkroom to get distracted or sidetracked now. I have faith that you will come through this and out the other side in good form. If there is anything I can do for you or Tanya, just ask. Heck, I'll even model for you if needs be....
ReplyDelete